Thursday, October 25, 2007

a bowlers game...

"i'm going."


and that was about it. there really wasn't much to explain considering that during holidays the parents were more than content to let the boy off on his own, running around the town and being up to no real good...it was better than having the boy stay at home and crib and complain all day and put up with his whining. too bad that the boy couldn't stay put in one place. he had his books that he devoured at an astonishing speed and then once he was done reading he had nothing...that's when the whining started. and that's when the boy decided to get going.

the boy loved his cycle. it was a shade of purple with a dash of red thrown in. to the boy there was no better color. the sleek racing bike was his ride and he adored it and he pampered it. it was his first love, and for him, at that time there was none better. the boy's destination hardly took him 10 minutes at max to reach on his cycle on a route that he could ride with his eyes shut. and yet in those 10 minutes he managed to find something new everyday. the dust and the grey factory building remained the only constant landmarks. the potholes were the variable in the equation; always there, and then there were more the next day. the people also seemed to increase by the day. the city in which he lived was a growing entity that was ever hungry and that seemed to swallow whole the areas that once were the outskirts. there was no stopping this beast. it simply grew on. the dull grey of the factory building was in itself impressive. the massive letters that spelled out the name were something that the boy always thought could have been better done some other way. still it was there as he rode past it.

the heat and the dust was no deterrent to the boy and his friend. there is something about being boys, maybe its the age, that makes most things in the natural order bearable. the mid day sun was a scorcher that sent everyone scurrying for cover. the asphalt on the roads would turn greasy as the tar melted under the hot gaze of the fireball while the dust danced about in small wind funnels sucking up the plastic bags and other garbage in the same manner that a house is uprooted by a hurricane/twister. and yet despite all this the boys carried on in gay abandon their game of cricket. one bowling and the other batting.

the boy enjoyed cricket, and especially bowling more than anything when it came to the matter of any physical activity. for him all that mattered was the fact that he had the cricket ball in his hands that he could throw at his opponent who was batting, make him dance around as he toyed with him and finally castle him and shatter his stumps. and every time he did so, he sported a wide victory grin. but most often it was the other way around, the boy's friend being a better batsman, managed to pick out the boy's intention and thwart him in achieving his goal. the ball would promptly be dispatched to the other end of the ground and the boy would scurry after, bearing in mind only one thing.
"it mattered not how many times he got hit for a boundary. what mattered was that every now and then he would manage to produce that perfect delivery that would leave the batsman gaping and standing rooted to his spot like a fool on a podium."
and that was reason enough to retrieve the ball and get back to the marked run-up and continue bowling. he had his heroes in the pacers of the international game who did the same at a much tougher level and he had to live up to their expectations and never give up if he was indeed a 'real bowler'.
the human thought is a funny thing. it has a systematic eccentricity about it that makes it so. the conscious memory of a person is something that we build up in the process of building ourselves. we learn to remember certain things in a certain manner that helps up mold into the sort of person that we are. the other aspects of our lives that get classified as the daily and mundane are locked away in some discreet corner of our brain, condemned to be forgotten over time. but that really never happens. our thought capitulates our past into the necessary and the unnecessary and adapts it to the present while at the same time brooding over the yet to pass future. but then there are always triggers that release the locked away memories. sight, smell, sound, touch and the other present senses stimulate the past and force it to surge forward like a wave crashing on to the coast. it engulfs you and grasps you in its folds and drags you along with it back to the past. and all one can do is surrender to it and feel the wild emotions flow through one's body and enjoy it.
...revelers, that's what we must be. today i reveled in the memory of my boyhood and my friends and the games that i played as i grew up. today was my first day of the so-called-holidays. a nice and sunny day outside with a clear blue sky.

:)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

holiday plans...

and so considering the fact that the holidays are knocking at my doorstep, i really am a pathetic planner not to have charted out a sort of plan for the month long "arse chilling" time that i am to be bestowed with. ah well, i guess that i am just going to stay at home here in Baroda and do nothing!!

life is good when doing nothing. no traveling, no working. no socializing, no everything that is in the order of my daily life (which my roommate would vouch actually consists of nothing)...

hurrah to doing nothing! NOTHING ROCKS!!

ps: have been splurging on books and intend to do more of such.


Sunday, October 07, 2007

life as contemplated over breakfast on a sunny day...

sometimes it makes much more sense to simply let things work themselves out for us. sometimes pushing and prodding stuff to make it happen does not lead to solutions...
the veritable sage once said, "Problems are either unsolvable or they have a solution. if they have a solution then there is no need to worry about them, and if they don't have a solution then there is no sense in worrying about them."
...life will deal with things in its own Karmic mannerisms. so be good and hope that life returns the favors with a bit of interest.

am in Bombay today. wasn't planning to, but then here i am. all it took was a call from mom asking me to accompany her and a six hour train ride (mostly spent sleeping) and here i am. traveling seems to have taken up a significant majority of my time of late. ever since i decided last summer that i needed to get out of Baroda and the horrendous brain-rot that i had gotten myself into, and decided that the best way to do so was to travel and keep my mind occupied, i haven't looked back. hidden amongst the immense landscape of India, the cities of Kolkata, Cuttack, Bhubaneshwar, Warangal, Bombay, Surat, et all have seen me stop by in my endless pursuit over the months. i have managed to regain some of my rationality and have also been able to give my creative side a greater leash to explode into my writings and workings...
but now it seems as if i just can't stop. i have always had a life that has taken me places. wonderful experiences all of them. but then, somewhere along the path it seems that i have managed to entwine myself so tightly in my traveling-seat that now even if i want to hop off and stay put, i cannot. i can only take things one day at a time, not knowing where i shall be tomorrow. i have a firm picture of what i want to be and where i am going in life in general. just that i seem to have lost myself in a strictly geographical context. yesterday i was in Baroda, today i am in Bombay, tomorrow i shall be in (?).

...people ask me where i am from? "from here and there" is what i reply... आजकों हम यंहा है, कल का कीसे है पता। ...life is fun when its uncertain. but only in the short run! in the long run stability is what counts...that's the lesson of the day in Basic Economics for you students. now run along. class dismissed!

ps: currently reading 'By the River Peidra i sat down and wept' ~ Paulo Coelho।

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

relativity can be fatal. it just depends on how you see it...

something that everyone prefers to do on a holiday is to catch up on sleep. the sweet comfort of knowing that you are not required to drag your arse out of the bed and face the nuances of a daily life is a feeling that is not reciprocated in the breaks that holidays beget in my daily life...
somehow i have managed to negotiate my terms with life in a manner that allows me to snooze on unabashedly on a daily basis. losing out on my sleep is something that i am not willing to compromise on.
...call me lazy! but that's the way things are with me. still, today i decided to go all out and try and force my laziness/ability to sleep to the limits. and i failed! ah well, i have learned to accept failure in my stride. life teaches one such things.

in other things, the one place where i am fighting a constant battle is with my so called smoking habit. seems as if the entire world (i.e. dearest Ani, Bela ma'am, Summi, Chicka and my mom) have come to believe that a cigarette and I are synonymous. *puff puff* ...ah well, i wage on my war for my friends (and partly for my own "super-large-cannot-fit-in to-a-tinned can-EGO" that refuses to accept defeat to any substance that strives to subjugate me with it's addictive habits). my cigarette is like my paramour whom i visit every now and then. i spend some time with her and then move on...i go back to life as it is supposed to be...and then i come back to her again. and she always welcomes me with open arms and slaps me with her nicotine kick and then embraces me in a smoky haze.
smoking can kill! DO NOT SMOKE!

i am looking for a job. it just seems that i have plenty of time that i am not utilizing in the optimum manner. working and having a job would sort that out. but its kind of hard to just take up any task that comes up to you. first there is my father to contend with, who has a very strong belief that i am not supposed to waste my time doing odd silly things for a job. my sole purpose is to study and nothing else. for that he is willing to provide my with all the necessities (and to an extent quite a bit of luxuries as well) in life. all i have to do is study. that is the deal. on the other hand i have my own sense of elitist requisites that prevent me from taking up a task that i feel is below my qualifications and abilities (there is no way in Hell that i am going to sit and receive calls from all over the world inquiring as to why their PCs don't work, only to remind them that they need to plug it in first. Outsourcing and working in a Call center/BPO/KPO is just not for me. i am not a receptionist who is going to say, "hello how may i help you sir?" in an Indian accent). and because of that i have suffered so far. but finally things are looking up and there might be something that i can substantiate as a "decent job" to my father and "a challenging experience" to myself. but for now i am keeping my fingers crossed.

oh by the way, today is the birth anniversary of a certain Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. dude first got us our independence and then a public holiday on his birthday. hurrah to Gandhi! Happy Birthday man and thanks a million for everything...

thought for the day: success is not something that can be accounted for by immediate gains.
~quotes on the AMTS bus.


;)

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

pitstop blogging....

considering that i have been quite unable to blog of late, i really don't seem to have felt the pinch! you know, the "damn, i miss blogging!" feel that regular bloggers usually suffer from once they are removed from their lofty seats. i felt it initially when i first came down from Mauritius, but now i'm just used to it! Internet access is just a walk down the lane, and yet its as if there is an unfathomable distance that needs be covered...life is moving on!

in other things, i finally got my second tattoo!! Yay!! i have always wanted this...my family symbol that rests atop the crest of the family temple is finally inscribed into my body...dad thinks that i'm loony and mom simply shrugged her shoulder and stated, "You were always fascinated by that symbol right from your childhood. its no wonder that you want it as a tattoo now!"

in other things, might soon start free lancing for the Times of India! heaven knows that the Baroda edition desperately needs a face lift and better articles in terms of quality writing.
another set of Pickwick Papers??? i believe not
...but something shall come out of it...at least i'm going to try and make it happen so.

apart from that...life has been pretty cool. India lifted the Twenty20 World Cup in South Africa and we really kicked some arse in order to do that. even Gordon has to agree to that! guess that the twenty20 format of the game is here to stay... just got done with the Reading and performance of Macbeth this Monday. and the best part was the cool reviews that we got in the papers..always makes one feel good when one's hard work is appreciated.

anyways, i gotta go run along now...have to give a presentation on the issue of Genocide for my political studies course...bet you have quite a bit to say on that Jaanu!!!

to all those whom i know and love..miss you all and God bless you!

;)

Sunday, August 12, 2007

the ripples of Tapi...and a very old city!

so i'm here in Surat!

considering the fact that i have been looking forward to this trip since quite some time, it really has lived up to my expectations. something that is quite rare!
i very vividly remember the journey to Mauritius, there were so many things that i had imagined...and so little that i found at first glance. was sort of disappointing. but once again, the wisdom of the ages prevailed, and i learned to keep a hold on my expectations. life has a way of revealing itself slowly. it takes it's own sweet time to initiate us into its mannerisms and there is not much that we can do about it. we just need to learn to go with the flow. everything is worth it's wait! patience counts and life never manages to fail to amuse and astonish me. yes, we may feel let down at times, but it's just a matter of time. time is infallible. Mauritius was worth it! Life is worth it!
anyways, Kaz's home is worth the trip! its the most fabulous house that i have come across. i really have no idea of how to go about explaining it. but all i can say it is that her parents are amazing...her dad is a freakkin genius of an architect/artist and his home reflects his creativity in a mirror image. located on the banks of the river Tapi, it is a symbiotic confluence of nature and art. everything withing the house is a work of art (including her mom's cooking! magnificiento!! and the kitchen wine that they make??? amazing!!)

the only other house that has enchanted me as much remains the cabin that Dez had rented. remember the lovely beach house to the south of the island?? all i can do is sit and wonder when am i going to have the resources to have a similar house of my own! i know exactly how i want it to be.

am in love with my house. even though it does not exist yet! still i'm in love with it!


there is a lot more that i have to say...but right now i must go. life is good and i am living it. i'm going with the flow and there's nothing that i regret about it!

ps: by the way, the history behind this city is that this was the city that the British first sailed into from the Arabian Sea and up the currents of the river Tapi under the guise of the East India Company. not a very fond memory for us Indians, but it's the truth nevertheless.

until next time! much love!

:)

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

the story teller...

have put on my writer's spectacles and scratched my brains and pondered over a lot of things that need to be said & now it's time once again to write! to liberate my thoughts and drown myself in my experiences...

it's time to tell a story and see myself through the ink that seeps into the paper as i pen down the words that personify the solidification of my abstract imagination!

...am writing a story! actually two stories! and i have an hour glass in front of me showing me the passage of time, that as usual is not my friend in this race...one week...two stories! it's going to be fun!

:)

Monday, August 06, 2007

ramblings...

considering the fact that everything seems to have taken a step towards being a snippet out of an old slow motion movie, life seems to be going on pretty decent. the same old monotonous routine and the same faces around. and still there's so much happening...feels like as if in a dimensional wrap or something of that sort. i must do something to break the chain...maybe i should go to Surat and visit Kaz (Saad can tag along if he wants to see his girlfriend and Ani is certainly being dragged along)!

in other things...i have to go along with Ani and meet the Governor of Gujarat this Friday. then catch the train on Saturday for Surat!! Yay!! i'm certainly looking forward to getting out of Baroda for the weekend.

and yes, ever heard of the following?
'single track mind', 'a whore and a half', 'red, ocher, burnt sienna with a tinge of olive green piece of shit'!
wonder where people come up with such innovative titles/epithets???? ;) no wonder we all love Ani...only she can say all this!

plus, what is the deal with Krishnamurthy and the entire Existentialist Philosophy?? have this irresistible urger to dive into a proper explanation of the entire matter, but won't. Sartre, Nietzsche, Kafka and Kierkegaard shall have to wait a bit longer before i discuss them, their works and their thoughts on my blog!

Chocolate Chip Ice Cream is yummy & indulging is blissful! need i say more!

:P

Sunday, July 22, 2007

squishy yoyo's...

just when i was finally thinking that "maybe, just maybe, my life is falling into some sort of order" i am once again reminded of how instantaneous life is in reality and exactly how much i thrive on my capacity to adapt and go along with the flow.

but first and foremost i have a confession. i have been bad! the reasons, i hold back...but let it suffice to be know that i have been not up to the standards of my best behavior (
& i blame Saad for the me lee that we have caused & for the moral dilemma that we have put Fahad in to. :)

so this weekend was sort of planned as a quite little rendezvouses with my cousin Anuradha, Milan (who flew in especially from Mumbai for the occasion) and my uncle and aunt at Mount Abu for her 25th birthday. Mt Abu is this lovely little hill town situated around about a 5 hour drive from Ahmadabad. a picture perfect destination that was a much welcome escape from the heat and the bustle of Baroda and Ahmadabad. not that we stayed too long, for we must have been there for a maximum of 30 hours or something, but they were just what we all needed. in any case, the pictures are up on the photo blog for everyone's viewing pleasure.

secondly, i am once again engaged in a house hunt. this time around we are all looking for a place for Anindita who got so unceremoniously told to leave her wonderful house just cause the owners were incapable/ unwilling to rent out their place to someone from the Fine Arts Faculty after the aftermath of the protests. its a long story on how they (i.e. the fundamentalist organizations) are creating problems for the students and the supporters of the liberal cause in Baroda. but that is a matter unto itself.

for now we are looking for a house! and if nothing works out, Ani can always move in with me! (HURRAH!! a certain part of me wishes that so bad!!) :)

later then amigos!

cya.