Once upon a time in the land of mauritius there lived a bunch of friends. during the weekdays they all studied in the university and behaved like any other normal student, but come weekends they all assembled to a secret place called flic n flac where they partied all night long. sometimes they even carried on with this ritual into the day. this bunch of merry friends included few 'crazy germans', few 'sane germans', two americans, a canadian, a bangladeshi, an indian, a rodriguan, few south africans and their local mauritian companions.the crazy germans were called hubsi, timo, rastaman, harry and little anne. the sane germans included silvia, mitty, big anne, inna, michael, norman and bettina (there were a few more but they preferred to hang out by themselves…and so we call them 'the other germans'). heather was the only canadian. nafiz and nachi (i.e. myself) hailed from south-east asia and joel was the rodriguan bitch. gordon and his mates were the big south africans and stephanie was amongst our very own mauritians. all put together they were one big party making gang who never tired from their crazy antics. some of these antics were to become legends in their own times. this tale is in honor of those great people and their friendship. but before you proceed, keeping in with the tradition you must fill your glass and drink to these legendry folks. if you fail to do so, woe befallen, you shall be cursed to a life of immeasurable insanity and sexual deprivation.
the legend of the rampage in the shopping cart.
one day sir hubsi and sir nachi were given the task of going to the shopping center to fetch some groceries. you see, sir timo was simply feeling too lazy to do anything. therefore the dangerous mission of going to the shopping center fell upon the shoulders of sir hubsi and sir nachi. now as soon as the knights received their task they set out towards the shopping center in their noble steed, the car. there is no describing the dangers that they faced and the difficulties that they overcame in the twisting and turning path towards their goal, Jumbo!!
now, once our brave knights reached their destination they decided to leave their steed in the parking...(of course given the choice i suppose sir hubsi would have taken his car straight into the shopping center. nothing better than a hit and run for our sir hubsi!!)...well the car couldn’t go in, hence once the noble steed was parked outside, sir hubsi and sir nachi had to search for different means to carry their groceries. and what else would suffice but a shopping cart? so our two brave knights picked up a shopping cart from the cart stand.
...well, i could give you more of this stories and legends bullshit or simply give you the hard facts on what happened. i have no more patience to sit back and write in such a shitty manner. no matter what way i put it in the humor still remains intact. so please spare my poor self this pain and just read on...
so hubsi and i pick up a shopping cart. now, only god knows why, i tell hubsi that i could give him a ride in the cart if he wanted one (me and my big mouth!!). guess what? hubsi leapt at the chance and jumped right into the cart. well now that the damage was already done, and the fact that i was quite unaware of it at that moment, we entered the mall. a big white guy in a shopping cart being pushed around by a small indian guy going from aisle to aisle picking up their groceries. yep, just try and visualize the sight in your mind. also try and visualize the reactions of the other hundred shoppers who just happen to be having quite a normal day until we walk by, or more correctly, ride by. it was more like:
what in the name of christ is this world coming to?.. bloody lunatics.. crazy.. look mom, now why can't i have a ride in the cart?.. what the hell just passed by?.. whatever!!.. and a dozen other looks on people's faces. most just grinned and there was this lady who just couldn't stop laughing. but the icing on the cake was this little bald kid, must be around 3 or 4 years old, who was in a cart right in front of us in the canned food section. the poor kid just couldn't believe his eyes and he just stared at hubsi in the cart with his mouth open and jaw dropping, his eyes almost popping out of his sockets, the biscuit he was nibbling on frozen in mid air as he tried to figure out what was happening. that was a 'picture of the year' moment. (too bad we didn't have the camera with us).
anyways, soon enough hubsi had to get out of the cart. you see the cart was getting quite full and we really did not have enough space for all the groceries and hubsi in the cart. also the fact that pushing around all that weight is not easy and i certainly was having a hard time doing so. hence, hubsi out...groceries in.
well the remainder of the trip is not worth mentioning (i.e. unless you find a description of standing in the queue to pay for you groceries and carrying them back to the car interesting).
on the way back hubsi almost managed to have us both killed. fucking brakes, they never work when you really need them. good thing that the guy in front of us decided to accelerate ahead before we slammed into him from the rear. i guess that's what you get for acting crazy in a shopping mall!! that's god's revenge for making his greatest creation look like the dumbest thing on the entire planet.
well i guess the tale ends here...we got all the stuff on the list...the mission over, sir hubsi and sir nachi, our two great heroes returned home in full splendor with the groceries.
~ fin~
now, once our brave knights reached their destination they decided to leave their steed in the parking...(of course given the choice i suppose sir hubsi would have taken his car straight into the shopping center. nothing better than a hit and run for our sir hubsi!!)...well the car couldn’t go in, hence once the noble steed was parked outside, sir hubsi and sir nachi had to search for different means to carry their groceries. and what else would suffice but a shopping cart? so our two brave knights picked up a shopping cart from the cart stand.
...well, i could give you more of this stories and legends bullshit or simply give you the hard facts on what happened. i have no more patience to sit back and write in such a shitty manner. no matter what way i put it in the humor still remains intact. so please spare my poor self this pain and just read on...
so hubsi and i pick up a shopping cart. now, only god knows why, i tell hubsi that i could give him a ride in the cart if he wanted one (me and my big mouth!!). guess what? hubsi leapt at the chance and jumped right into the cart. well now that the damage was already done, and the fact that i was quite unaware of it at that moment, we entered the mall. a big white guy in a shopping cart being pushed around by a small indian guy going from aisle to aisle picking up their groceries. yep, just try and visualize the sight in your mind. also try and visualize the reactions of the other hundred shoppers who just happen to be having quite a normal day until we walk by, or more correctly, ride by. it was more like:
what in the name of christ is this world coming to?.. bloody lunatics.. crazy.. look mom, now why can't i have a ride in the cart?.. what the hell just passed by?.. whatever!!.. and a dozen other looks on people's faces. most just grinned and there was this lady who just couldn't stop laughing. but the icing on the cake was this little bald kid, must be around 3 or 4 years old, who was in a cart right in front of us in the canned food section. the poor kid just couldn't believe his eyes and he just stared at hubsi in the cart with his mouth open and jaw dropping, his eyes almost popping out of his sockets, the biscuit he was nibbling on frozen in mid air as he tried to figure out what was happening. that was a 'picture of the year' moment. (too bad we didn't have the camera with us).
anyways, soon enough hubsi had to get out of the cart. you see the cart was getting quite full and we really did not have enough space for all the groceries and hubsi in the cart. also the fact that pushing around all that weight is not easy and i certainly was having a hard time doing so. hence, hubsi out...groceries in.
well the remainder of the trip is not worth mentioning (i.e. unless you find a description of standing in the queue to pay for you groceries and carrying them back to the car interesting).
on the way back hubsi almost managed to have us both killed. fucking brakes, they never work when you really need them. good thing that the guy in front of us decided to accelerate ahead before we slammed into him from the rear. i guess that's what you get for acting crazy in a shopping mall!! that's god's revenge for making his greatest creation look like the dumbest thing on the entire planet.
well i guess the tale ends here...we got all the stuff on the list...the mission over, sir hubsi and sir nachi, our two great heroes returned home in full splendor with the groceries.
~ fin~
so this is how the story ends. now it is up to you folks to decide whether this is worthy of becoming a legend or am i just an awful story teller. whatever you decide let me know soon. there are many more such crazy antics to hear about if you are interested.
1 comment:
I vote legend!
I have a username on this thing, but I can't for the life of me remember my password...
Oh well.
Love Heather
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